Clarence Tan shares his wonderful story of how love conquers all on popular Facebook Group Subtle Asian Traits.
Clarence is Chinese. His newly-wedded wife, Edna Sophia, is from Ghana, West Africa.
Having dated for 3 years, they managed to tie the knot with Clarence’s father’s full blessings.
Trials and tribulations
Perhaps almost naturally, Clarence’s family reacted with resistance, especially from his father.
While it was easy to simply brush off his family’s disapproval and married Edna anyway, Clarence refused to due to having fostered a close relationship with his dad. Clarence was adamant about gaining the approval of his parents.
Clarence’s father commonly raised comments to do with the distinct cultures and backgrounds the two came from, and that he might potentially face challenges in the future as a businessman.
“Hurtful” comments have been passed:
Clarence, this is your choice so you can do whatever you want. But don’t expect my blessing. I may or may not show up at the wedding if you marry her.
Undoubtedly a demoralizing comment, but Clarence saw hope that his father did not outright declare that he would ultimately not show up at the wedding.
Clarence decided to bring her home on a weekly basis to get to know his parents.
The beginnings were especially rough, for the tension was palpable. His father often puts on a look that conveyed a mix of disapproval and wanting to maintain his composure. Edna too, had to struggle since she was hyperaware that she was unwelcome.
Edna and Clarence often got into arguments as the latter often pushed her into visiting his family. At one point, Clarence even had to lie that she was personally invited for dinner.
I’ve Grown Accustomed to Her Face
Slowly but surely, his family eventually warmed-up to Edna. They’ve come to learn of Edna’s wonderful attributes, as detailed by Clarence:
She’s intelligent, kind, extremely caring & considerate, and polite. They learned about her spending most of her free time working on building my company (now our company, obviously), as well as her financially supporting me at times. I had purposely kept it silent as it was embarrassing— but they eventually found out that it was their son who lucked out. After enough invites and conversations, they realized that this is for real and they started opening up to her.
After 3 years of hard work, Clarence and Edna were finally able to tie the knot.
His family, too, had a change of heart, and his dad was the couple’s biggest supporter.
It was difficult but 100% worth— since she’s the one.
Clarence understood the importance of filial piety, and wanted to ensure both Edna and his family could live harmoniously in the long-run.
Having also shared this on the Subtle Asian Traits group, Clarence hopes to spread a message of never giving up and letting their love inspire.
Clarence and Edna’s tenacity and determination allowed them to start their marriage on a right foot, and we hope nothing but the best for the couple.